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I think I will pass almost for sure I don’t think I am likely to get a first which I am ok with because I don’t wanna do anything that involves having a first in linguistics. Like all cool people, I became disillusioned with my degree in 3rd year. linguistics is cool but it’s not a “life skill” course.

awwwww shucks. I try. I wish I could not send these to twitter  from here because this is some terrible self-indulgent bullshit to tweet.

when you feel sexy get a boner and when you dont feel sexy lose ur bonr.

It is not like that for me but I never get super insane drunk where I can’t remember shit even when I try. My flatmate is rll rll bad for getting super wasted and losing control of himself and finding himself in a strange house in the morning with no knowledge of the hows or whys.

So I guess: no, it’s not like that for everyone, but it is like that for some people.

Ok so this is another thing I was talking about just today with a person. I find it super hard to quantify my own worth, which I think is fairly common, but it came up in this conversation specifically today. I am actually kinda good at writing. I can write in ways that are accessible to people who aren’t interested in the subject. It’s shit that comes fairly naturally to me, but apparently is not that common. I find the basics of programming really simple. Once things get complicated or high-pressure, I find em hard, but for the most part I can handle the shit I wanna handle.

My biggest weakness probably is my difficulty in reading other people’s feelings. Even just from like, that other question, I was all like “ahhh, I’ll just leave. nobody gives a shit. whatever.”, but people have made it clear that they DO give a shit. I have destroyed relationships via not reading my partner right. It’s something I find easy to get wrong, and that hasn’t sorted itself out quite as much as I woulda hoped by the time uni finished. I dunno, it’s something I hope gets better over time. I have still been in very few actual relationships so I feel like it’ll just happen eventually. I HOPE it just happens eventually.

In five years I would love to be making indie games at a high enough level to support myself. That’s like, my top dream. I would LOVE for that to work out. Second most, I’d like to just write about games and support myself with that. It comes so natural, and I do love it. Analysing mechanics and narrative far further than they were necessarily intended is a thing I’m mad into. Third most, I just wanna be out of my parents’ house and supporting either of the top two wishes. I am gonna hate living at home so much, but at the moment it’s a necessary inbetween point before anything else can happen.

oh my gosh, anonymous. I feel bad OFTEN. I am likely to feel bad TOMORROW. I am PROBABLY going to feel bad tomorrow. But, real talk, I often feel bad. At many points, I feel like things might overcome me. I get insomnia often enough that I don’t even notice anymore. This past winter was so sad for me that it was only THIS WEEK that I realised how bad I was feeling. The sun does wonders for me.

So I guess, in conclusion: thanks a lot for your hug and salute, I hope I remember about them at a point when I need them.

7.

my biggest thing rn is probably: don’t underestimate how much you mean to people. today I have hung out with a bunch of people I was like, kinda friends with, but now I’ve discovered I was more to each of them. I was planning on leaving aberdeen with little fanfare, but they are so upset about that I feel like I have to do something massive at some point. It’s a heartwarming and bittersweet thing, to leave all these people behind. I dunno how many I’ll end up staying in contact with, but they’ve all touched my life, in no matter how small a way.

12.  also: what?

There was a p funny thing recently where @posh_somme asked ppl to twitpic themselves holding something other than a phone to their ears. there was dildos, bananas, cactuses, books. I used my glasses and made a dual joke about videophones. That’s what you’ve been missing on twitter. also other shit, but mostly that.